In which the OBlogs are a bit scarce this year

Alternative Oscars haven't been around for a few years. A combination of dangerously low energy levels and lack of time have contributed to this being the only OBlog I've managed to churn out this year. Anyway, here they are.

Best performance by an inanimate object:
The boulder (127 Hours) – It's pretty big....I guess. Not as big as I was expecting, although I suppose it did the job…
The horcrux (Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part 1) – almost drowns our hero and drives Ron out of the trio. It’s a lot of work for a bit of metal.
The spinning top (Inception) – never has such a small object sparked such a round of debate
The microphone (The King’s Speech) – managed to make it look looming and intimidating
The Harvard rule book (The Social Network) – ultimately useless, but it tries its honourable best
Rooster’s eye patch (True Grit) – he is WEARING that eye patch

Fictional location you’d most like to spend an afternoon:
The Mad Hatter’s tea party (Alice in Wonderland) – a little uncomfortable, maybe, and you’d have to change your seats every now and then, but you’d never be bored
The Future Room (Blue Valentine) – not, it turns out, all that romantic, but perhaps the future just isn’t like that
The tent (Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part 1) – perhaps a bit short on entertainment, and a bit high on danger, but the company and locations would be pretty cool
Ken’s dressing room (Toy Story 3) – be honest, you’re dying to check out the rest of this wardrobe, this would be the most fun you’d have in an afternoon

Best one-liner:
“……..Timing is not my strong suit.” (The King’s Speech)
“I’m six foot five, 220 pounds, and there’s two of me” (The Social Network)
“No one appreciates clothes here, Barbie. No one!” – (Toy Story 3)

Transport of choice:
On pointe (Black Swan) – ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!
Your own small plane (The King’s Speech) – despite the inherent coolness of flying your own plane, I suspect my air sickness would limit any cool points
Long row boats (The Social Network) – put it this way, as long as you were in charge of steering, it’s a nice way to get around
Horses (True Grit) – I’m willing to accept that not everyone likes horses as much as me, even though I’m allergic…though I don’t suppose constant sneezing and antihistamines would fit in well in the old west. Still, considering the alternatives…

Best meal in a motion picture:
Urine and chocolate bars (127 Hours) – um…no.
“Eat me” cake and tea (Alice in Wonderland) – so long as you find the pot of tea without a dormouse in it
Nothing at all (Black Swan) – impossible. Utterly impossible.
Wine (The Kids Are All Right) – Annette Bening is a mean drunk
Vodka and Viagra (Love and Other Drugs) – hardly sustaining on a long-term basis…and now I’m regretting my choice of words

Beer and pizza (The Social Network) – not the healthiest of diets, but apparently it didn’t stunt anyone’s mental capabilities

Picks up next!